Beyond 37

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January 24, 2014

Today 20 years ago I was flying out to Utah.  My first time ever west of New Jersey and I think my first time ever flying on my own.  And packing for extreme cold weather and still look cute, was not something that was easy to do.  And to pack it in one suitcase?  Sweaters take up a lot of room, boots to keep the feet warm but be snow worthy and figure out what shoes and dress to wear for a party you don’t know what to expect for.  In fact, didn’t know what to expect on any of it.  But I was so excited.  For so many reasons.  It was my first time really of knowing about the festival.  First time traveling by myself to unknown territory, first time film would be seen with more than 10 people, because the screening at IFFM in New York that luckily was seen by the wonderful Bob Hawk to recommend it for Sundance, didn’t have very many people in those seats.  I don’t recall how many, but it wasn’t much more than those of us in the film and crew that made it there.  Sundance is definitely a very different experience when it comes to film festivals.  Actually, I think that film festivals today are very different then they were 20 years ago.  But maybe it’s because the film festivals that I’ve gone to since then have been here in LA.

       Everything was all arranged by someone on Kevin’s end.  We would all be housed in a condo like room with 2 bedrooms and sleep where you may.  Which to me wasn’t an issue.  Done it many times with my girlfriends, I was just going to be out numbered in this one with lots of guys.  While in the air I knew there had been a screening of Clerks already and would be missing it.  All I thought about was what to expect and what to do.  Once landing in Utah I had to find a Van that would be taking me to Park City.  And once in Park City, make my way to the condo and hope that Kevin let the front know to expect me so that I could gain entry to the condo.  No one was there at the time.  They were out exploring or doing what one needs to do to make themselves known when in Sundance, Network.  

I found a corner where to put my luggage and probably refreshed myself a bit while checking out the surroundings before heading out to the wilderness of Sundance.  I think I asked the front desk for directions on where everything was.  I knew I had to go to the main to the Festival headquarters to pick up my package with tickets to screening what I would be attending.  Thankfully it wasn’t too cold as I walked around, trying to figure out my surroundings.  And then it happened.  Something that just takes you by surprise, but is so hard to put into words.  You realize what you’re specifically there for.   That many are going to see you in the film you’re there to represent.  But what you don’t anticipate is the reaction and you certainly don’t expect to be in the middle of the street just walking around when all of a sudden you’re stopped and appreciated for the work that you’ve done in the film and how much they enjoyed you and the film.  Can we say surreal!  

Now most people who know me, know that I grew up quite the shy person.  People who know me, I know were shocked to even hear that I had become an actress.  I wasn’t one to make myself known or heard.  But then again as I mentioned, I didn’t feel heard anyway.  Many were shocked to hear some of the words coming out of my mouth as they had never heard me curse.  So to all of a sudden be seen and then figure out what to say to these people was a very shock to my system, but definitely was something to put a smile on my face and feel a sense of accomplishment.  

I don’t recall how many more times I got approached on my way to headquarters to pick up my package, but Sundance was definitely turning out to be a great experience.  I picked up my package and was scheduled to see a film, so I made my way to the theater and was waiting inside the lobby before being let in.  That’s when I got to see the one person that basically is Sundance.  Mr. Robert Redford had walked in the door and was walking through the lobby and walked right past me.   That was my first real celebrity sighting.  But the first thing that went through my mind….wow, he’s really wrinkled.  But yes ladies, still handsome.  

So continued the day, I went back to the condo to meet up with the guys but honestly a lot of it is all fuzzy to me at this point.  I remember many of us going to breakfast.  Doing some interview and publicity moments.  Gathering at the condo where we were staying to shoot a little interview promo piece of us Gen- Xr’s walking down the court yard of the condo and then seeing when it posted of us all walking in slow motion.  Everyone on in the condo all talking about what was happening.  Most of them being night owls and me wanting to get some sleep.  lol  

Memories that are still there is once Brian got into town and we would be walking around, people would immediately recognize me and then I would have to introduce them to Brian because he had shaved off that famous goatee that no one knew it was him.  The first screening that we all got to experience with a packed theater was wonderful to experience, because they were all laughing in the places you wanted them to be laughing and you can feel that they were enjoying the film.  Some changes had been made to the film at this point I think, can’t remember for sure if it was for Sundance or for later in the year before the movie was shown at the Tribeca Film Festival, but I do know that when finally it was edited down, some of my scenes were cut from the original, but I couldn’t have been happier as I felt they were my weakest scenes and would have done delivery different.  By far the most memorable and most anticipated night was after the final screening of the film where Brian and I went out while the big wigs got together and see if Clerks would be bought by Miramax or not.  Brian and I talked about what it would mean wondering what was taking place and what the outcome would be.  And then we got word that it was bought.  Back at the Condo, it seemed forever before Brian and I could go to sleep and talking and wondering what the future would hold for us and how and if it would change big or small.